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” I sat back in my seat and took a second to think about it, granted it was about in the morning and my brain was only at about 30% capacity, but his question really made me think.

I decided to on the typical answer of the importance of honesty and communication, ya-de-ya-de-ya-da. We went on to have a 15-minute conversation about his friend’s relationship and how unhappy he is.

Now, I have been dating this guy (pre-med, kind of nerdy, logical, strategic type of guy) for two years. He is smart, consistent, predictable and incredibly faithful. He has been very intentional with my parents and with his desire to love and cherish only me. There is no "magic," and I feel I could logically live without him if we broke up.

I love him very much, but we do not have the same "chemistry" that I shared with the first person. I just saw the first guy again this week and was reminded again how strong the chemistry is between us.

I am dating a guy, we started with emails and then a few more weeks of talking on the phone.

When I met him and saw him for the first time I just wasn’t attracted to him physically.

When he dumped me, I felt my heart would never mend, and three years later, I still struggle with that relationship loss.The first kiss was so amazing you were overcome with starry-eyed dreaminess and there were imaginary fireworks going off around you, it’s just a shame you had nothing to talk about over dinner.Or was it the other way around; loads in common but the butterflies and physical attraction just wasn’t there?Three years ago, I fell madly in love with this lively, fascinating guy (plays in a band, popular, surprises you at work with chocolate, picks you wild flowers type of guy).We had similar thoughts and passions and were able to understand each other incredibly well.I sense that what you are asking is which one is more important? Having someone you enjoy spending time with, can talk openly with, is accessible and available to you, and seems to share the same feelings are really the basics for starting a romantic relationship. As much as it’s enjoyable to be with someone who “matches the resume” you are looking for, in the long run the lack of passion is likely to become a problem.

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